The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
