chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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