i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
