brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
May the power of my ass compel you!!
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Randomize
