I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
