so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
My vagina is very pro this idea
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
