Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
