Your dad touched me again.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
