Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize