Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
