It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
