Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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