More tranny stories later!
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
