It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
