You really coming over, don't trick.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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