all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
