you told grandpa to call you daddy
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Alive.
So much puke
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
