So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
im six kinds of drunk right now
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
