So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
