Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
