i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
