Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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