she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
