i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
