i just wanna soil my oats bro
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
