Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
