i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
