Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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