I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I still have a little drunk in my system
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Then you guys just all showered together...?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
