Your favorite bartender is back from prision
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
