hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
