I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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