i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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