Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
