She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
