Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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