mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I would ride that face into the sunset
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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