I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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