it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
