Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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