we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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