is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
