i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
