your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
