I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
