I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
