dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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