ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
