The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I deserve this hangover.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
