I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
